All my life I used to say: love anyone your heart choose but marry the one your mind choose
for the first time in my life I feel confused!!
what should have the decision of your life?
what should have the decision of mine? !!!!
Thursday, April 21, 2005
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11 comments:
you made a little mistake, what you mean is you "like", not you love!
you don't love a person becuse of "..."
you just love the person as a whole and as he is , without trying to update of mend him, believe me love is not your choice, marriage is your choice, but the question is , based on what , your mind, heart or your soul!!!!???
I believe you will never know why you love a person, that is because you never mean to love a person, that is why they call it "fall in love"
My friend, you never mean to "fall" , do you ??
Philosophers spend their lifetime trying to describe feelings ,and most of the time they miss the chance to live those feelings!!!
Philosophers live the life from its outside, this give them the chance to see things we can't see from the inside!!
yet they still unable to see things that can't be seen from outside, they have to be experienced to be understood, that applies much on emotions, you can't judge it until you taste it yet your judgment will still be incomplete as it differs from one to another (you can't judge the emotions of someone else, and someone else can't judge your emotions).
According to our human laws, there is finite limits for everything, but emotions has no finite limits, it then has no known frame of reference, philosophers may sometimes be right, but they can never reach the truth of a single human feeling!!!
In love, follow your heart. If you follow your mind, then you are making all sorts of judgement. For example, perhaps you will be thinking "Okay, I will marry her because she has money," or "Okay she looks very beautiful and she will help me climb the stairs of society," etc.
Whenver such judgements are made, true love can never happen. And all the basis of those judgements can easily dry up (she grows old or something happens and her beauty is lost, etc).
My friend KL, I agree with you 100%
the problem is , marriage is not just love, it is life, previously , I thought it should be based on more than love only, now I am getting confused, is love all we need for good marriage, or will the mind have a rule in such a decision !!!
Well, I'd say love AND marry whom you chose both by mind and heart...
You can't just fall in love blindly, you have to think rational too, and at the same time you can't marry someone whom you don't have feelings for.
One more thing, make sure you're 100% convinced of the one you chose to spend your whole life with, coz feeling may go after a while, and what only remains is the mutual understanding, respect, and common interests, so if there was none of the above, that'd be a PROBLEM....!!!!!!
my dear friend # Juwaireyah #,
if you have ever been in love, you will understand what I mean.
sometimes you fall in love with the wrong half, that doesn't suit you, you spend days finding what is good between you and what is bad, measuring points for and points agains, but when it come to love, you can never give it points or measure it, and you find the result in favour of your love even if all other measures are agains it!!
it is a very old question that I thought I had its answer a very long time ago, but I was sooooo stupid :-(
sometimes you fall in love with the wrong half, that doesn't suit you, you spend days finding what is good between you and what is bad, measuring points for and points against,
BUT when you don't find any of these points love fades away, that's what I think, Coz one day you'll realize you have chosen a wrong person, and when feelings go away nothing will be there to tie you up together...
That's what I think....
I know you are right, but sometimes you can't take the hard decision when you are convinced that he is not the right half
I lived all my life with the same principle like you, but in practical life, things doesn't seem as clear as in words, it is hard to find the things that doesn't suit you in someone you love, because you love him, you will temporarily forgive him for everything, accept almost all his problems and think they can all be mended later, and who knows, you may be some how right!!!
it is the mess when you love someone you can't judge the right way, did you read the post about loyalty on my blog?
although it talks about a different thing, but again when you love something you are blinded from its problems most of the time
Thank you all for your opinions, I really needed to share part of my soul with you, thanks # Juwaireyah # for the song on your blog, I listened to it many times as I like it much but don't have it yet, thanks :-)
Well, I guess if you just forgive everything in your lover because you love, then you'll be making a big mistake, coz sooner or later you'd start to realize the differences, and will regret getting too much involved, that's what I think.
You're mostly welcomed, glad you liked it :)
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