Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Good bye

Tomorrow, I will mostly be on my way to the army, so this is my last day here I guess

It is a good bye then, a good bye for you and for me too, for the character that lived here between you, this character has to move to the shadows now as it will not have a place to live in

I thank the chances that made me make this blog because I got through it to know all of you, some of you became very close friends to me and some even more.

Yet it is time to leave, everything must have a start and an end but believe me, the friendship we had though this place won’t end because it will always last as memories on the internet witnessing the talks we had together on the comments and the chat boxes J

It is time to pack my stuff, wish me luck then


Monday, April 24, 2006


Few days a go my mom came and asked me, why do I look sad!!

I didn’t know what to say, I finally spoke: “what on earth could make me happy??”

It is enough to listen to the news everyday to get you into deep depression, I don’t know how to express my emotions but it seems like I am lost

It seems the ethics I have has no real meaning, they are nonsense, they don’t have any meaning but in my fake world, but in the real outer world they mean nothing, they don’t exist

Everyday I read the news and it seems like blood falling from the letters if it is not already blood that was used to write those bold bloody headlines, it is not in Egypt only, it is all over the world… something like madness invading the entire universe leaving us in a real trouble

Today I spend long time trying to understand… why??

Why Egypt? Why Sinai?
Why during feasts? Why three times blasts happen in 6/10 (October war) and 23/7 (the revolution) and now 25/4 (Sinai liberation)???

I can’t say I am sorry for those accidents, we are all responsible somehow of such things, we are responsible for the acts that happen because we don’t move a finger to stop it like it is going on in another country, blaming the security for it, damn the security it is our country and if they are not interested to protect it then we should put them aside and handle it.

It is our silence and our “understanding” for violence against civilians in some other parts of the world (like Palestine) that gave those murderers the chance and the reason to make such blasts thinking they are doing the right thing.

Lemna was right when she commented on my topic about fears that the most dangerous fear is the fear of losing the difference between what is right and wrong, that is what drives people that mad and make them commit the most terrible crimes thinking they are just doing a great job!!

What is going in Sinai?? Does any one know what is going on there??

P.S: I meant to put a good happy photo for Dahab, I hope all blogs will not publish the bloody photos, it is painful enough

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Seed of hate, stories from my past

I am not going to get involved in the current madness running in Egypt; it is painful enough to watch it daily

Yet I wanted to tell you a story that happened to me when I was a kid

I had two friends, Mohammed and Remon, both were very good friends, we were always together like attending lessons together, study together and walk after school together until the driver come to take each of us

Someday Remon got away from us, he was like avoiding meeting me or Mohammed, with the white heart of a kid I couldn’t know why, and he even went away from us in a cruel way

At that time I had no idea of the meaning of a difference, being a Christian or a Muslim was just another meaning for the religion lesson that we move into a separate room and that is all, we never asked or wondered even why!!

A friend of mine came and told me that his family asked him to stay away from me and the other Muslim friends, and the reason was another boy in the group called Yousef, I never liked this guy, even a child could notice he has much evil!!

This was the first time I hit into such a stupid situation, all I can say is that it was cruel and I wondered what kind of parents could do that?

Lately my little niece came to me saying things about “her Christian friend” at school!! I wondered, where did she get that expression, she was talking like understanding there is a great difference, what did put such a seed in her young pure soul??

Sometimes I really thank god I was born for those parents specifically!!

Monday, April 10, 2006


What scares you more most of the time?

1. To be right
2. To be wrong
3. the people discovers you were wrong
4. you discover that you were wrong
5. you discover that you were right

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Just today

For our long time with each other, I never noticed she is a girl!!

she was the friend I can speak to, we were together since we were children and I could never think of her as different, or..

just today I understood that she is a girl, and just today I understood that she never forgot that, how could I !!!???

Forgive me for the times I couldn't realize the truth, sometimes you only realize what you want to realize, or what you need for

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Happens in Egypt

For all my life almost I lived in Egypt, yet after all these years I feel I never reached its heart

Yes we were separated from the heart of Egypt, we never had connections with people like normal people, me and my family were mostly disconnected from life in Egypt

We had our own procedure and our own style, we couldn’t approach people or understand them and in return they couldn’t understand us either.

I am really looking forward to know people more, to know Egypt more from the surface and historical touch I know, history tells you about the body of the country but the soul of it can’t be obtained but by direct contact

On another issue, I got offended much by a recent incident, why do people have double faces? Why do they act with you in a way different from the way they do with you??

Recently, I was offended by being called an idiot by someone who seemed to respect me when we directly contact, why did this someone speak badly about me? What this one knows about me to talk about me in such an aggressive way?

I am used to forgive people, but I can’t forgive to be betrayed easily, and I deeply feel offended, it could be my problem that I trust people easily, or let say that I assume good nature in all creatures.