Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Scheisse

Is it wrong that I am not fighting for this?

Ok, let me say things mainly to myself...

First, I have a huge problem of commitment, I already have fears of the future and of my always changing feelings and mind, yet that is not the reason I am not fighting for it, I was never of the kind that lets his fear of the future stops him from doing what he believes in

The problem is that I think if fear of the future or whatever that may be scaring her is the reason for her to backup, then it is not deep enough or real enough on her side, and so it wouldn't make any sense to even talk about it!

I can't change the minds of ppl or their hearts, even if I can, I wouldn't choose to do that! although some ppl think that this is a smart guys stuff to hunt a girl and get her, but sorry, I don't see it as a battle or a game, I see it as a life chance, something that must be really wanted by both sides

I have made my choice a very long time ago about this, thought sometimes I get misunderstood that I don't care enough but I made it clear between me and myself, my partner in life must want this as much as I want it, not a bit less


3 comments:

Lasto adri *Blue* said...

As a friend, I thought my comment may be of any relevance. Fa trying my luck..

I guess its some what unfair from your side. You can't expect people to be exactly the same as you. To have your same calculations or even more.. same attitude.
You can let go of your fears, others done. And in case you liked/loved someone who can't.. then you may need to take them the way they are..
Or else, you can put as.. I want someone who feels completely free as I am. This way makes more sense, and your right of course.

Sometimes it isn't also about fears. It's about knowing people. How far do you say you've known a person enough to jump off a wagen and run in their direction? A chat? A 1 hour meeting? Or even being colleagues in an office?
You can be brothers and sisters and not know each other enough. Or you could be far away friends and known each other like open book. How far enough is enough for you? and of course your partner?.. Would you risk unknown unknowns? or you then its enough to have the known unknowns?

It's complicated.. and vastly differ from one to another. But mind you, you just can't expect people to react like you .. or else, you are unfair to yourself more than anybody else :)

Cheers! and good day

freeSoul said...

I understand your option and kind of agree with you

it is just that what i said here is not a logical thinking, it is just feelings, although it is not very logical but it is sensible to my emotions somehow

Yah ppl are different, and I don't want persons that are the same like me, but I want ppl who accepts me as I am as well, and kind of share the same interest even if this interest is shown in a different way

For me it is not much about knowing ppl, it is about feeling ppl, feelings comes in higher place for me when it comes to relations, and knowing/logic comes second, not less important but just comes in later stage to validate the first impression imposed by emotions

العاب said...

well done